Action Jackson

Year: 1988

Genre: Action

Directed: Craig R. Baxley

Stars: Cal Weathers, Craig T. Nelson, Vanity, Sharon Stone, Thomas F. Wilson, Bill Duke, Robert Davi, Jack Thibeau, Roger Aaron Brown, Bob Minor, Ed O'Ross, Dennis Hayden, Al Leong

Production: Warner Bros.

If one were to take all the ridiculously over-the-top action parodies from Family Guy (1999-Present), The Simpsons (1989-Present) and South Park (1997-Present) and put them into a blender, you might frappe something resembling the 1988 police action turned post-modernist parody of itself Action Jackson. The 1980's was a weird decade in film. Yet the one thing all popular genre flicks had in common is when they went for it, they really went for it, giving the audiences gobs of what they wanted; in this case, explosions, nudity, bloodsport and homoerotic muscle flexing. Now granted they couldn't get Arnold Schwarzenegger to make it to the carnival that is Action Jackson, so instead we got Apollo Creed himself to play the titular hero. Pardon me if my jubilation seems muted.

Because all action heroes are named 'Jericho'

Sgt. Jericho 'Action' Jackson (Weathers) is a no-nonsense cop from the tough streets of Detroit. who has become notorious for putting the law into his own hands to get results. Jackson investigates a bloody corporate murder spree all pointing to car magnate and psychopath Peter Dellaplane (Nelson). The nefarious Dellaplane has not been a fan of Jackson since his sexually violent son was nearly beaten to death by the infamous cop. Thus he conspires to frame Jackson for murder and cobble together a political empire based on corruption and probably Kung-Fu.

Starting with the good; the action in Action Jackson is too ridiculous to not recommend. Director Craig R. Baxley started his film career as a stuntman and it's easy to see. The tactile voracity of the stunts and the cavalcade of completely unnecessary self-created mayhem gives the film a dumbfounding glee. One could get completely wasted playing a drinking game revolving around redemptive cop cliches, derivative car chases and things that go boom; to say nothing of Sharon Stone's constant need to parade her jiggly bits. In addition, the dated soundtrack provided by The Pointer Sisters, Bernadette Cooper and Vanity (who also plays Jackson's love interest) are sure to leave those who sniffed the Colombian dancing powder in the 80's in a cold sweat.

Next time on: We Love the 80s!

Unfortunately despite it's inspired campyness and ironic offerings, Action Jackson looses so much steam in-between points of action hero machismo. When actors are required to, you know, act, the camera stays frustratingly static and sucks the life out of all the performances. Bill Duke, who plays the overused gruff Captain cliche gets off worst of all often shot like a guy doing a Skype interview. Then their's Thomas F. Wilson who seems like he walked off the set of Police Academy (1984).

This guy is awesome!

Yet for every bad supporting performance there's an inspired take, like Bob Minor's perma-smirked henchman and Al Leong as Dellaplane's obedient chauffeur. As for Carl Weathers; well there are some decent moments of pool cue-breaking tomfoolery that makes his action star credentials beyond reproach. Unfortunately as an overstated force of nature; let's just say there's a reason Weathers wasn't retained for The Expendables (2010-2013).

As a movie, Action Jackson is a boring, atmosphere-less trifle that is on par with lesser brain-dead muscle epics like Only the Strong (1993) or Double Impact (1991). Yet as a super-dated 80's throwback, Carl Weathers's best chance at action hero stardom is the kind of entertainment that can give anyone the giggles. Check it out only if you must.

No stew for you!

Final Grade: D