Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead

Year: 2010
Genre: Documentary
Directed: Joe Cross, Kurt Engfehr
Stars: Joe Cross, Phil Staples, Siong Norte, Stacey Kennedy, Joel Fuhrman, Ronald Penny, Mandy Reinking, Barry Staples
Production: Us & Us Media

You know, I got to hand it to Joe Cross, the enthusiastic Australian stockbroker turned lifestyle guru who spearheaded this 97 minute infomercial. He instinctively knows that the best way to prime his audience is through personal stakes and dramatic results. Thus instead of going the sane, unsexy route of weening out of bad habits to slowly lose excess weight, Cross puts his body through a 60-day juice cleanse while driving across America, confronting ordinary citizens about their diets. Why; probably because its easier to hock his "Reboot with Joe" program to those looking for quick and easy solutions.

It's easy to buy into it. The rotund sufferer of chronic urticaria we meet at the beginning of the film has the easy-going personality of a lazed step-father being asked for $20 bucks. Even as he looses the weight, he massages the soft sell with a canned genuineness and an easy to digest chipper attitude. "I was fat, and there was no one to blame but myself," he says in a moment of reflection. He liquefies his veggies and goes all in. "Don't taste half bad."

I do what I want, because Amrica!

As the film wears on, Joe faces off against the litany of excuses people have for eating what they eat. "I only got so long on this earth, I might as well enjoy it," is the common refrain though my personal favorite answer to the question, "why do you eat all this junk?" has to be, "Because I'm sixteen." Everyone in frame seems to know they're not doing the right thing. To Joe these people are addicted to food and lack the willpower to seek solutions. The solution in his eyes is of course a "reboot" that will reprogram the body to readily take in micronutrients and macronutrients. "If all the world's major religions fast, then they must be onto something."

I'm no nutritionist so I'm not going to make any bold claims. Lest to say, there's probably more to a healthy lifestyle than Joe Cross's musings and a few choice doctors stating the obvious. This is where Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead gets into serious trouble. Thanks to clever editing, Cross's self-evident truisms seem to meld into doctor testimonials with no actual data to backup anything. Nowhere is this more evident than when Cross's third act guinea pig Phil Staples goes into the doctor's office with him and he prods the doctor with leading questions like, "What will happen if Phil continues to eat like he does?" and "Is Phil healthy enough to go on a fast?" Notice he never asks "Should he go on a fast."

The film also ignores the social aspect of its project. Joe's example, as amazing as it looks on TV, probably has more to do with him being able to spend 60 days consuming less calories than Gwyneth Paltrow starring in a Calista Flockhart biopic. The rest of us, you know, have to work for a living and need the caloric intake to make sure we don't collapse on our wheelbarrows and in our cement mixers (I'm assuming my readership are interminably sarcastic bricklayers). We also often live in food deserts, suffer from malnutrition, succumb to social and peer-pressure such as indulging in a Fourth of July cookout etc. Yes, it's ultimately you choice but your choice is informed by the world around you. And if you need any further proof that a 60-day juice cleanse may not work for everyone, check out Phil's article, "I Was the Poster Boy for Weight Loss...Then I Gained 200 Pounds".

Lack of data, lack of comprehensiveness and the nagging suspicion that you're being sold something you don't need, like a canister of turtle wax. That is Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead in a nutshell. The fact that it's so laser-focused on creating and maintaining a brand may just be its only saving grace because it least it doesn't have that far to fall. It simply wants to make what it does look great and I suppose it succeeds in those modest ends. It's ultimately a D+ doc; C- because I'm embarrassed to say I dusted off the old juicer after I saw it.

Final Grade: C-