5 More Days

Ah! Why did I decide to make a countdown the theme for this week?! Just looking at the title fills me with anxiety! Just thinking about running 26.2 miles makes me winded yet here I go attempting the near impossible.

In fairness I've been training all year though if I was honest with myself, I haven't been training as hard as I should with extended breaks on Thanksgiving (because of food poisoning) and in early August (due to injury). Even while training I never really pushed myself as far as I could go so a ten mile run is about all I can comfortably do. adding 16.2 more to that, I'll be dead by the end, that's if I reach the end.

My friend Aly is keeping herself motivated (she also doubts her discipline but she actually made it to 20 miles). In order to stay motivated she's dedicated each mile to someone or something that's near and dear to her heart which I thought was a neat idea. She claims it's not just a display of gratitude but a welcome distraction as your body in slowly shutting down mile by mile.

When I was in Americorp, we had a similar thing where we wrote down who or what we're dedicating our service year to. I dedicated my City Year jacket to ten or so teachers that inspired me to become a better life-long learner and as lame as that sounds, it actually helped ground me. So inspired by Aly and my time trying to "make better happen," I'm going to do basically the exact same thing. But unlike Aly I'm going to explain myself because I need to write...something...

Mile 1 - Latinos Progresando
I mean, makes sense to put the non-profit I'm raising money for at the top. LP helps provide support for immigrant families in the greater Chicago area through legal services, scholarships, cultural events and education. I was immediately drawn to the work they do both as a Latino and as a person who has seen up close what immigrants have to go through in a foreign land.

Mile 2 - My Mom
My mom indulges my various passions and hair-brained ideas in the only way a mother could. My parents will be there for the Marathon waiting by the Pilsen stop to cheer me on and then waiting at the finish line to put a blanket around me and get me to a hospital.

Mile 3 -Maisie
As I've mentioned before, my friends are crucial to me. Maisie has been a little sister to me for the past seven years and in that time I've seen her grow into a kind and wonderful human being. Her laugh fills the room and her ability to down an entire fifth of vodka with little more than a shrug fills me with envy.

Mile 4 - Guy Casey
While I've only known him for a year or so, Guy Casey has been crucial in my struggle to understand my depression and anxiety. He's a strong-willed, incredibly talented and giving person and I really hope out of all the comics I know, he's one who makes it.

Mile 5 - My brother Pedro
Pedro is my closest brother in age and emotionally as he's the only one I remember really living with (we also lived together briefly in college). He's a good-hearted person with a wonderful wife and two darling kids. He's had more challenges than myself including a minor health scare this past week but he's never stopped staying positive which I admire.

Mile 6 - City Year and Americorp
I spent only a year doing the hardest job I've ever had yet that year made quite an impact on me. I've made life-long friends in that time and still appreciate the organization for what it did for me and what it tried to do for the city I love so much.

Mile 7 - Reese
Speaking of life-long friends I made in Americorp - Reese. More than most they helped me truly develop a sense of self after my breakup and had the patience to stick with me when I was in my nadir.

Mile 8 - My brother Douglas
Next in age is my brother Douglas who never fails to laugh at my jokes. He's a funny guy in his own right and he's also the only brother I know to have struggled with depression. He's got a wife and two children.

Mile 9 -  Aly
The person who I harangued into this and will likely beat me to the finish line by two hours. She's the angel on my shoulders and has been since I came to Chicago.

Mile 10 - Shirley
If Aly is the angel on my shoulders, Shirley is my well-meaning but snarky devil. She's always quick with an insult but still has a good heart and a lot of comedic talent. She's also one of my newest friends so let's see if she'll last.

Mile 11 - My sister Tanya
Tanya, her three children and her husband will be in attendance during the Marathon. Not sure if it's for support or strictly for mockery but there it is. Tanya also had mental health issues in the past so it's good we have that in common.

Mile 12 - My Work Crew
My co-workers keep me motivated to do my best. They've been supportive of my goal to do the Marathon since the beginning and they've been patient with me as I've struggled with my issues.

Mile 13 - My Dad
Only makes sense to put my father around my limit.

Mile 14 - Steve
My buddy Steve is the only one that stuck it out past the improv classes I took last year. He's a fun-loving, extroverted maniac but I love him anyway. He also has a daughter who is a delight but has been going through health crisis after health crisis. I partially dedicate this mile to her as well.

Mile 15 - Jan
Jan has been my friend since freshman year of college and e still talk off and on. Her generosity of spirit has always been something I admire and I enjoy the way she carries authority as a teacher in a benevolent way.

Mile 16 - Clark
One of my movie theater friends who's been around for a minute. We bonded over old films and theater and he has since moved to New York to pursuit his dreams. I've always admired his talent and his positivity in the face of adversity. He's another one I'm sure will make it if for no other reason than he's never really doubted himself.

Mile 17 - Yorick and Brad
Two friends I've known since high school and arguably the oldest friends I have. Both have kids now and have drifted slightly but life always has a way of bringing them back into the fore. Yorick last visited me a couple of months ago for the Pokemon Go Fest that was happening in Grant Park. As for Brad, I was a groomsmen in his wedding.

Mile 18 - My brother Jason
The next in the long line of siblings (I'm the youngest), Jason has two kids and a wife who have been supportive for the last few years despite me not seeing much of them. Jason's one of the funniest people I know and after me and Pedro, had the toughest time with my father.

Mile 19 - Emily
Emily was one of my improv buddies from last year who has since moved out to Connecticut. She still calls me though which is always a surprise and a pleasure. She's a truly kind person who more than anyone else I know isn't afraid to be herself. She's also among the most open people I know.

Mile 20 - Pam
Pam has volunteered/promised to mock me on the day of the race with treats and drinks. Many say by mile 20, people start to drop out like flies so by this point, I will need her motivation.

Mile 21 - Raquel
Another friend I've known for years, she will be in Chicago for the weekend of the Marathon but will be leaving just after it begins. She's here to see a concert with a friend so it was a happy coincidence she'll likely be one of the last people I'll talk to before croaking.

Mile 22 - Girl Casey
Casey recently had a two person sketch show at Second City and the results were stupendous! She's hilarious and one of the best co-hosts a person could ask for.

Mile 23 - Jim
Another friend from college who has since moved on and has a wife and kid. He's a gifted writer and fun to be around in his own understated way.

Mile 24 - My brother Kevin
The eldest of my brothers and arguably the one who "did it right" with 2.5 kids, a wife, two cars and nice house. He has my pity.

Mile 25 - Immigrants and refugees everywhere
I consider myself an immigrant despite the fact that I became an American citizen immediately after birth (I was born overseas). I truly feel for those who's desire it is to have a better, more stable life but can't because of red tape and unwarranted cruelty.

Mile 26 - Those with depression and anxiety
It is only this year that I have realized the true gravity of these mental disorders and have had to deal with the fallout. To those who are not strong enough in the moment to struggle through their lives, know that there is always someone out there to help alleviate some of that discomfort.

.2 Miles - The city of Chicago
This is home.