When Fate Throws You a Bone

I, am an obsessive. I know this, I've leaned into this. I've quelled a lot of demons being meticulous and fixating on the minutae to the dearth of other things that would otherwise melt my goddamn brain. Does that sometimes mean that I get blindsided by stuff I'm ignoring...perhaps. But other times I get blindsided by things that are overwhelmingly positive.

So in order to accentuate the positive I am writing with good tidings. I kid you now, there should be a big banner with the words "I'm f**king happy!" written in comic sans. Will it last? Not thinking about that...I'm not I swear.

It all started when a mic host announced on the social media groups I frequent announced he was not going to have enough time for the mics and would like to pass the torch. I had not been to the mic in months as the room was a little scattershot via the audience, the mic size and the reception. Still, I put my hat in the ring thinking little of it. I've only been doing this a year and some change and I'm not exactly a well known comic around these parts. I kinda just wanted to push myself a little - Worst case I've started the process of inoculating myself against professional rejection as opposed to audience rejection. "Thank you for submitting your clip to our showcase but we hate you go away." Cool.

To my surprise the interview process was one simple question: "do you have an amp and a mic?" "Yes" (I didn't at the time but what's a fib amongst comics). "Cool, you start tomorrow."

And just like that, I'm thrust into hosting two mics! Immediately I recruited two of my friends to co-host and made new posters I can add to social media to advertise...you know because the first thing a kid does when his dad builds him a club house is he designs the flag.

My mind was aflutter with ideas on how it was to be run. A jovial space for comedians to try out new things in front of a supportive crowd. An ideal first-timers paradise where I and my co-hosts would keep the energy up with nonsensical rigmarole. At our mic, I'd shake hands with every comedian who was to perform - make them feel welcome, get them talking about who they are what they're about and mold the space slightly so they can be that person.

I waddled into the establishment like an emperor penguin completely oblivious to the smack at the back of the head I was about to receive from the bar owner. Apparently there was bad blood between the former host and the owner. Bad blood which necessitated him to bolt in the night leaving me holding the proverbial bag.

I'll serve you, but I don't have to like you...

Long story short, bar owner calls the shots. We start the mic when he says, we bump comics when he wants us to and patrons who heckle are tolerated so long as they're patrons with money. So much for the egalitarian dream.

Still, nothing was going to wreck my mood. Even when the cheap guitar amp I had boosted started to fizzle and pop, I was busting my way through my first hosting job like I had been asked to sub for Conan. As one of my friends said after the night was over, "you had bits on bits on bits and they all were landing." I even kept the owner at bay. Usually he hovers around the mic like a rain cloud. I didn't make him laugh I don't think but t least I didn't make him shout.

The next mic he wasn't even there, though to be fair, neither were a lot of comics. It was an intimate crowd of about a dozen but 2 from the Friday mic returned for the Sunday mic...a good sign in my book. It means despite bending to the whims of a despot, we managed to keep things welcoming and fun.

Hosting a mic wasn't even a goal for me this month. Hell it wasn't even a goal for me this year! I always knew it was beneficial because of the crowd interaction, stage time and connections but I never once assumed anyone would give me the reins to an established mic as a guest-host let alone the new permanent host! Just goes to show you the unexpected doesn't always have to be bad.

Also I bought an amp and mic so no more sounding like we're hosting the mic from the bottom of a well.